The pain...

...is unbearable.

All I ask is for you to show me the map.
Just as simple as that, but you just couldn't do it could you.
I know it isn't just an ordinary map.
The map that leads to something important, important to you, but most of all, important to someone else.
Maybe I could be like a pirate and just steal that map and find the hidden treasure myself, but unfortunately, I'm not that evil.
It's just not my luck I guess.
There are thousands of maps out there that leads to loads of other treasures, perhaps, even more precious than of yours, just waiting to be found.
But something deep inside keeps telling me that someday, just maybe someday, I will eventually find that one special map that leads to the most precious and amazing treasure that no words in this universe can ever describe.
Someday, I will own that treasure and I will never ever let it go no matter what.
And you'll be glad that it was me who'll keep that treasure safe for you.
I'll wait if that's what it takes.
I'll wait a million years if you think that's the right time.
I'll wait if you ask me to.
I'll wait...
And I'll wait...

Holidays are finally over. College had started a week ago but somehow we can't register our subjects yet because we still havent got our majoring yet. Stupid MMU lembab. But I'm gonna go to class tomoro anyway. Yeah I'm all excited because I'm entering degree and we're gonna learn lotsa new, interesting and hopefully fun subjects .
Dad's coming homw next week and said we will discuss about me transfering to US or probably Australia and hopefully, really, I mean HOPEFULLY , he'll let me. I really want to go to SCAD. It's one of the best art and design college in the US. Oh and also I'm getting a DSLR camera baby! Wish me luck for a Nikon D80.


Soooo, what have I been doing during the 3 weeks of holiday?

Well I:

Played my keyboard, learned some new songs, Apologize by One Republic.
Played my guitar, learned some new songs, Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Runaway Train by Soul Asylum, Umbrella cover by Marie Digby, and some others.
Played The Sims 2, along with some kiddies games like Burger Rush, Diner Dashm Wedding Dash, Pizza Chef, and also Spongebob Squarepants Diner Dash . Lols.
Internet 24/7, MSN, Yahoo, Myspace, Facebook, Gmail.

Oh and I met this guy on Myspace and then we chatted on MSN and stuff.
I read his blog and it kinda reminded me of myself not too long ago, always depressed and feeling alone like I've no friends, no one to talk to, and absolutely no one to trust. Though I'm not saying that I'm any different now, but I've tried my best to make friends and tried to gain a little bit of my self-esteem. I'm over that part of being always depressed. I've got a lot of friends now. But I still dont have anyone I can trust or talk to. I have 2 bestfriends though but I just can't seem to open to them about anything, my feelings, my life, or watever things that ppl do with their bestfriends. Heck, I don't open up to anyone including my own parents. I dont know why I'm like this, like keeping everything to myself. I just wish I could find someone whom I relate with and talk to with. I sucks and sometimes it does hurt when you've all the problems in the world on your shoulders and you dont know what to do and dont know who to talk to.
Anyways, enough of all this crap. I just need to move on and get on with life and except the fact that I'm who I am.
Hmm, I'm thinking of going to one of those acting classes at KLPAC this month. Hope it can somehow boost up my confidence and self-esteem.